Once there was a guy named Matt and he like to play Frolph. One day when he was playing frolph with his buddies they came across a dead body, located somewhere around hole 12 (aptly named the "Hole of Death" thou in this case is was because this hole liked to eat frisbees). Anyway Matt was like "what should we do about this dead body? Im really good at programing but not so good this dead bodies". His buddy Ben was like "Im not really sure because im not a very smart guy in general". His third buddy Rambo was like "Hey maybe we should toss it off the cliff just to see what happens". What happened next was totally crazy....

Rambo proceeded to shove the bloody corpse over the side of the cliff using his foot. Before the whole event had time to register in Ben's mind, Matt shouted, "Wait, don't do that. We might get blamed for his death!" But it was too late. The body plummeted over the side of the cliff onto the jagged rocks below.
Matt and Ben ran to the edge of the cliff so they could hear the body hit the rocks. They listened for 3, 4, 5 seconds. Nothing. Suddenly both Ben and Matt felt an arm slip around thier shoulders. Rambo had sneaked in between them without either of them taking notice. Rambo's pants were around his ankles, and he was singing some yoko ono. Matt dealt Rambo a bitch slap with the swiftness. Ben comforted Rambo and gave him a CBR. Matt moved away from the edge of the cliff and whipped out an ice cold keystone light from behind some rocks. As he took his first sip, he whispered, "ohhhhh beer goggles, I love to put them on."

After Matt finished his beer he chucked the empty can over the side of the cliff and turned back to Ben and Rambo. "So, what are we going to do with this dead body?," he asked.
Ben, being one of the most blood thirsty bastards on the planet exclaimed, "I don't know about you guys, but I'm gonna eat the son-of-a-bitch."
With a crazed look in his eyes and the others following closely behind, Ben made his way down the side of the cliff. He pulled a swiss army knife out of his pocket as he approached the dead body. Just as he knelt down beside it ready to dig in, a family walked up.

"What the hell do you guys think you're doing," yelled the father.

"I think they were going to eat that body," said the mom. "Go call the police," she said to the youngest son who quickly ran off to the nearest phone.

"Get him," Ben yelled to the others. The others chased the kid but couldn't catch up with him. Ben started swinging the knife wildly at the father. "Oh my God, he's going to stab you," screamed the mother.
"Relax honey, it's just a swiss army knife," said the father.

As he finished the sentence, the fathers eyes went wide as he felt the blade push through his skin and into his stomach. He felt a sting in his gut and a warm sensation pulsing down the lower half of his body. Looking down he saw only red, and that's when reality hit him. A wave of excruciating pain washed over him and he fell to his knees as a scream ripped its way out of his throat. He was dimly aware of someone screaming in the background of his mind, of something clutched in his fist, of the sirens slowly getting louder...

The father falls on his back and slowly removes the blade. Holding it up to the light, he sees a distorted reflection through a sea of red. Another spasm of pain wracks his body, and the world fades to black.

Then he voided his bowels.

The end